While certainly housekeeping is not poly-specific, the attitudes around housework and housekeeping can contribute to a happy poly household or rip it apart. May I present an option that might be of use to some of you: Unfuck Your Habitat The basic system might seem a bit like FlyLady. You do bit of work in…
Author: GoddessofJava
Comments and an Apology
Recently I was just screwing around with the back end of my site and realized that the spam trap had thousands of comments in it. Some small portion of those comments were utterly legitimate, and I did my best to search them out. However, it is entirely possible that I’ve missed some and wound up…
Being Awesome is the Best Solution
I have been in a poly relationship for the last year and half and things are good and bad. My boyfriend is married and has children and I knew that coming into the relationship. I have been in poly relationships before and he has as well. We all set some very clear boundaries in the…
When You Make a Mistake
My partner and I have been together for a little over two years and just about a month ago we decided to pursue Polyamory. It came at a time when we were both just starting to get over a huge hump in our relationship and were feeling really good about us. But it was also…
My Penis is too Magical
I was snarking how it is so common for a woman to be looking for a sisterwife, and commenting that you never see a man looking for another brotherhusband when people are looking for a third to add to a marriage. In mentioning this to The Prince, with references to a One Penis Policy, he…
More Anti-Poly Advice
Open Relationships: Partners, Threesome, Swinging, Polyamory and/or Including Any Additional Partner In Your Sexual Marital Relationship No, the answer is NO – DO NOT, I repeat in capital letters: DO NOT have any additional partner/person in your marriage. Threesomes, swinging, polyamory, any inclusion of any one in addition to your spouse as a sexual partner…
No Seriously, I Really AM Polyamorous
I met my husband three and a half years ago. We’ve been married for a year and a half. The first two years were absolute bliss. I was dating two other people when we met, and he was very supportive of me being poly, though he expressed that he wasn’t interested in adding partners for…
Overcoming Insecurities
How about some suggestions on working with your partner to overcome insecurities? Interesting question: and one that could be taken two ways. I’ll deal with the shortest first. If we interpret it as, “How can I fix my partner so s/he can be more convenient when I’m all hot and bothered about my new flame?”…
Where Do You Get Your Polyamory Advice?
I am occasionally disturbed by the plethora of polyamory advice out there. No, not because I think I need to be the only advice columnist (hardly!) but because I sometimes wonder how people evaluate the value of said advice. I’m sorry to say I probably have readers, myself, who would likely not consider my own…
Polyamory is a Lousy Relationship Band-Aid
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three years. While may not seem like a very long time we try to spend as much time as possible together however it generally ends up just being once a week (that and the fact seeing each other is a bit expensive because of gas). With…