A Reader Asks: I have been having a lot of problems lately; I know that the majority of the issues I’m having are PTSD-related, but some are related to my 6-month old poly relationship. I tried to join my local poly “community,” and was told that I wasn’t poly if I hadn’t had multiple, concurrent…
Category: Ask the Misanthrope
Ask the Misanthrope: Polyamorous Lie Detector?
A Reader Asks: My boyfriend told me that he was polyamorous two years ago, and I really liked him and I also liked the idea. I was the first to ask him if I could see another person, but he said that he didn’t feel comfortable about it and I understood. But then he had…
Intimate Connections and Really Hot Sex
It’s time to reach into the Goddess of Java’s mailbag and see what strange and wonderful questions come up. It seems that I have found myself in a crossroads about whether it is in fact possible to find people who share the same views on polyamory AND share physical connection with. My husband and I…
19 and Perfect Boobs
My primary partner and I had been togetehr and monogamous for 7 years. One day she started chatting up and exbf form 15 years back, went and saw him, kissed but nothing else, and talked on a daily basis. I never gave ultimatums and proposed trying polyamory as a solution to our situation. After a…
Want to be valued? Value YOU!
I need advice. My girl and I began exploring the “lifestyle” about 2 years ago. At some point mid way, I discovered that I was having nervousness block my performance, in my opinion because many encounters seemed rushed. I talked with my partner about doing solo dates, and she was very much against it. So…
Ask the Misanthrope: Coming Out as Poly
Dear Polyamorous Misanthrope, I recently started a relationship with a person who has never been poly before. We’ve been dating for a little over a month and things have gotten really emotionally intimate, really fast. It’s wonderful and we’re both really happy being with each other. The complicated part for him is that I’m very…
Ask the Misanthrope: Confused and Need Help
This letter is an edited highlights version – just for clarity’s sake: I am attracted to the idea of polyamory for the spiritual implications, perhaps even more so than the physical ones. I feel it can help us to grow more as people, and can elevate and expand our love and oneness to new heights….
Ask the Misanthrope: Left Out
A New Reader Asks: I have been seeing a guy,living and working with him for about 4 months. He introduced me to the idea of polyamory. I had honestly never heard of it, but the more I learned the more I wanted of it. Secretly I had been bisexual and interested in women for some…
Ask the Misanthrope: Jealousy?
A Faithful Reader Asks: My husband and I have been discussing polyamory over the past couple months. I feel comfortable with the idea, and I know we communicate very well with each other. I am actually concerned about how my reactions could possibly hurt his relationships. I know I have had jealousy issues in the…
Ask the Misanthrope: Careful with that Axe, Eugene
I am married (7 years), with boyfriend (year and a half), who also has another girlfriend (a few months). They are having trouble getting along; it seems to be a matter of different needs for affection, coupled with poor communication. I have heard only his side, I see how they interact and there is definitely…