I’m single but I find myself loving a man who is poly. He told me on our first conversation that he was poly and I still chose to continue to see him. Now I love him, we have sex and he said it’s okay if I have sex with other people but I can’t do…
Category: boundaries
I Hate the Way My Metamour Treats my Partner!
What do you do when you hate the way a partner’s partner treats them? This is a tough one. On the one hand, you love your partner, and of course, you want everyone to treat your partner well, right? On the other hand, your partner is a grown-ass adult* and needs to make their own…
Captain Awkward Writes a Great One
Captain Awkward just wrote an amazing article that really analyzes money, money inequity and how to deal in partnerships. The Letter Writer has a somewhat unusual situation, but wow, the analysis really fires on all cylinders. It is merciful but still talks about Good Boundaries. Please go read: Partner with Lots of Expenses and Little…
It’s Not Up to You
Hello, my husband and I have been with our partner only about three months she’s 21 and lives with family. Her family is now making her choose whether or not to be with us or them. We love her and want her to be with us, but I don’t feel right asking her to choose…
I Didn’t Mean It!
I have screwed up in one of my relationships. I said (well wrote) something idiotic and have destroyed someone’s enjoyment of a reasonably harmless pleasure. The Prince used to like diet Dr. Pepper. I don’t like it, and I said I didn’t like it. That, in fact, it kind of yucked me out. What I’d…
Three Sure-Fire Ways to Build Trust
I’ve read a few comments from some people going polyamorous lately — specifically people whose partners are starting new relationships, and I am noticing a trend that is so very easily fixable that I just have a write an article about it. You see, they agree to something, then they tie themselves in knots to…
You Have Rights in Relationships
I’d like to ask your advice – I am having some trouble getting over a break-up and wondering how to move forward. Basically, I was seeing a guy for a few months. We had spoken the first time we saw each other about our other lovers, and I understood he had a Domme he saw…
It’s Not Up to You
Hello, my husband and I have been with our partner only about three months she’s 21 and lives with family. Her family is now making her choose whether or not to be with us or them. We love her and want her to be with us, but I don’t feel right asking her to choose…
Don’t Be the Cool Chick
I am in a relationship and in love with someone who is poly-curious, but I also currently don’t trust him. I met him several years ago and we had a strong connection that left me broken-hearted when he (very sheepishly) admitted that he had a long-distance girlfriend. He then left overseas for a winter, during…
Not for Personal Growth
This is a letter from a reader, but is long enough I want to intersperse my answers by paragraph. In a previous post addressing jealousy and abandonment issues, you said the real question is, “Am I happy in polyamorous relationships?” I’ve been struggling with that question, and I wanted to ask another in response to…