I’d like to make a request of the polyamory community. This isn’t a poly-specific issue, but since polyamory and sexual issues often intersect, I think we’d be some good people to be the example-setters. Can we all, please, stop using terms of disgust for people to whom we are not sexually attracted? If there are…
Author: GoddessofJava
Relationship Broken, Add More People Doesn’t Work
So, me (26 F) and my partner (37 M) have been in what we call a monogamish relationship pretty much since the beginning four years ago. I’ve slept with many, many dudes, and he’s also had the odd sexual adventure. We’ve both agreed that we want an open relationship in the future, but neither of…
Jurassic Park Secondary
This week’s column is a guest column by Jessica Burde. Ladies, gentlemen and assorted gender identities, today I would like to address one very important point of natural law. Where there is PIV sex, there will be pregnancies. Period, dot, underline, hell I should probably just go and put it in all caps. But I…
Fortune Favors the Bold
I’m having some trouble. I’m a happily married man, with a wife of 8 years, and we’ve been polyamorous for nearly two years now. So far, though, it’s only resulted in a very close friendship of mine becoming, well, a lot closer– for me at least. I’ve been looking on online dating sites and the…
Transitioning From Triad to V
I am madly in love with one of my partners. We have been together for a year and a half. He has been married to a woman for 19 years whom I love dearly. They were not poly at the time. She had never been attracted to a woman at all until me but it…
Not at All Costs: there are times when you can keep working on the relationship
I’ve posted a series of columns lately where there is a gentle (or not so gentle) encouragement to get the hell out of a relationship. I bet you think this means that if there’s the slightest problem, I think you oughta just cut and run, don’t you? People who know me well enough to know…
Just Testing a Feature, Move Along
Playing with blog settings and testing a feature. But, to give it poly-relevant content: It’s about love. Really, no kidding. If you’re having a problem with your partner(s), all of you need to check Rule One again. Rock on.
Jack and Jill
About a year ago I met a man whom I had an immediate connection with (I still to this day cannot explain what made me feel so comfortable with him right off the bat as I am generally a reserved woman around strangers), and we soon after began spending quite a lot of time together….
PSA: Please Vote
Mama Java wouldn’t dream of telling you how to vote, because that’s just not how she rolls. However, she is asking you that if you are an American citizen to please, please, please vote tomorrow. Smart Voter has a reasonably non-partisan breakdown of the issues you’ll be voting on and how the candidates stand on them. Educate…
Never Promised Monogamy
So a couple of months ago I met man online who advertised himself as being in an open marriage. He lives far away. We hit it off in a huge way, and a month later he came to visit me. The chemistry was there in person, as well. He and his wife, with whom I…